2003

We spend most of our life struggling to create means/images that would make people around us love and revere us. Yet we forget that the people we meet everyday are placed there by a preordained decree. so when things dont go your way, it's not because you've been cursed but because your hindsight's become dull.

allahuma inni audhubika Ar-Rahman

Quotes to Note...

When you do nothing at all, things have a way of finding themselves

You can burn books but you cant burn imagination

You see only what you want to see

The broken bond between heaven and earth can only mend by a prayer from a broken heart.

Your teeth hold your words, your brain remembers them.

Blessed are those whose own faults have preoccupied them from the
faults of the others,..." Imam suyuti

Another conversation from the past..

1-23-2004

That's a very admirable quality; I, on the other hand, can’t seem to get my head out of my ... posterior. i think there are moments where i love for someone other than meself, but ahh then i put my conscious back to sleep.

and back to me. i dont exactly pose for arguments but i do let people develop their preemptive presuppositions as they deem fit. it aint my fault when my behavior doesnt fit into their finely crafted constructs that I get labeled, :insert your favorite label here: now, when I was a wee gal, I met this scholar who instead of being impressed, with my oh so creative imagination, was a wee bit turned off. He quite bluntly told me, to observe people in silence and first internalize what I know before I manifest it upon unsuspecting victims. Best piece of advice yet! Don’t ya love traditional shayks who smack your ego to death?

now, if you ever just sit and watch people, youll realize we're pretty funny. we live our lives like caged rats who have been trained to respond to various routines. even though we still manage to miracoulsy think with 'opposites.' we seem to have restricted ourselves to a very black and white (yes, just black AND white) interpretation that is rigid as well as ahistorical.

we seem to judge people according to our own beliefs or the beliefs of our adversaries. in other words, we only see through our own eyes or the eyes of our opponents. it's either this or that. nothing more. (hmmm, I should post this in girls and boys gone wild thread/ and ofcourse this idea too was picked from Mr. Jackson!)

hey wait, i havent spoken about myself or my views in the past 15 sec, so back to me. Now being a subjective human whos dependant on her Lawd's Will, i'm in the process of constantly re-evaluating my position and place in this oh-so-mean-world.

In my subjective happy world, ive
interpreted 'goodness,' 'purity,' 'nobility,' 'godliness,' and "other" virtues as abstract ideas that we humans attempt to internalize/humanize in our constant struggle. i, believe these ideals fluctuate in every body that has a beating heart, and these ideals manifest in different people of different creeds in various intervals. in other words, there is no guarantee that I, a muslim girl, will always remain in my current state based on the labels society has etched upon my forehead.

and so, again in my subjective struggle, seeing a lack of what i would call a reflection of submission to the Absolute Truth, i feel myself gravitating toward those who happen to exhibit some of the aforementioned "IDEALS."

like i stated in an earlier posting, i'm in love with the idea of love, not necessarily ARAGON. He just happens to be a vessel that carries the message.

now i dumped aragon for katsumoto, simply because, the later was more real and thus more believable in his embodiment of things characteristically virtuous. thus, the instant attraction. my departure from katsumoto fan club, however, was his ‘acceptance’ of suicide tactics, especially since they fell outside the boundary of ‘despair’ for which one can argue on individual bases. Anywho, In my subjective beliefs, life ends when God intends it not when I will it. All shame and honor comes from Him, as He uplifts and debases whom He wills. Katsumoto, believed himself so devoted to his cause, that his cause, transformed into his arse, causing him to end his life. (how we insult our ex? So sad) (I kid, I still love katsumoto!)

In walked this idea of Jesus, a person who supposedly devoted his life for what he believed to be the Message of God, a message of Love so pure, it made his personal pride and choice, irrelevant. Publicly humiliated, beaten senseless, and almost crucified on the cross, he still overcame the last temptation; a temptation of wonderment as to why God had forsaken him?

This modern Mel Gibson ideal happens to adhere very closely to what I would assume to be the qualities of an ideal personality: someone who is well-aware of God as well as his own position in the larger scheme of things. God, I can ramble on and on and on

And on. Hope that explains my LOOOOOOOOVE for James.
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How the living may help the dead

Praying for the dead, asking forgiveness for them, and giving charity on their behalf are some of the things God causes the dead in their graves to benefit from and be protected by. There are many hadiths about this, and many fine and virtuous people have witnessed it in their dreams . Sa'd ibn 'Ubada, may God be pleased with him, once said to the Messenger of God, may peace and blessings be upon him: 'My mother's soul departed suddenly, and had she been able to speak she would have given alms . Would it bring benefit to her if I did it on her behalf?' 'Yes!' he replied . So he dug a well (for people to take water from) and said: 'This is on behalf of Sa'd's mother. '
And another man said: 'O Messenger of God! My parents have died; is there anything left with which I may be good to them?' And he replied: 'There are four things: praying and asking forgiveness for them, carrying out their promises, being good to their friends, and giving proper attention to those kinship bonds which could have only be attended to by them. '
And the Prophet said, may peace and blessings be upon him: 'Were it not for the living the dead would have been doomed'; in other words, because of the prayers and requests for forgiveness and for mercy which they receive.
And he said, may blessings and peace be upon him: 'My Nation is a nation covered with mercy. Its members enter their graves with sins like unto the mountains, and leave their graves having been forgiven because the living have asked forgiveness for the dead. '
It is related that the gifts of alms, prayers, and Qur'anic recitation sent by the living to the dead reach them carried by the angels on plates of light, and adorned with silk handkerchiefs, and they say to them: 'This is a gift from so-and-so', and in this way they find joy and delight.
A dead man was once seen in a dream and, upon being questioned about his state, said that he had been greeted by an angel who attempted to burn his face with a flame held in his hand. But one of the living said: 'God have mercy on so-and-so!' -and the flame went out.
One of the greatest things which one may offer to the dead is to recite Qur'an and send on the reward for it . This is of great benefit and baraka. The Muslims have agreed on this everywhere throughout the ages, the majority of scholars and virtuous people have recommended it, and there are hadiths to confirm this. Although, these hadiths have weak chains of transmission, there is a principle, as the hadith scholar al-Suyuti (may God show him His mercy) has said, that: 'Weak hadiths may be acted upon when they indicate acts of goodness. ' And these are indeed acts of goodness.
All the Qur'an is blessed and beneficial, but the most beneficial thing to offer to the dead is Surat al-Ikhlas eleven times, and this has been seen in many blessed dreams . Each person should recite this noble sura the said number of times, either each night, each day, or more, or less, or even only on Thursday night, and offer this reward to his parents, teachers and all those who had rights over him.
He must not forget his dead ones when he prays, asks forgiveness, or gives alms, lest he in turn be forgotten after his death, for the one who remembers is remembered, and the one who forgets is forgotten . Benevolence goes ahead of you, and God allows not the reward of those who have done good to be wasted. ( 18:30 )

Visiting Graves
You should know that it is recommended to visit graves . The Messenger of God, may blessings and peace be upon him, permitted this after having at first forbidden it . It contains benefits both for the living visitor and the dead person who receives the visit . The Prophet said, may peace and blessings be upon him: 'Visit graves, for they remind you of death . ' And: 'I used to forbid you to visit graves, but now you should visit them . They render one able to do without the things of the world, and remind one of the Hereafter . ' He also said: 'No man visits the grave of his brother and sits by it but that he (the dead man) finds solace in this, having his spirit restored to him until the visitor departs . ' And he said: 'A dead (person) in his grave is never more comforted than when those that he loved in the world pay him a visit. '
When a visitor enters the cemetery or passes it by he should say: 'Peace be on you, O place of believers. We are granted respite until tomorrow. That which you were promised has come to you, and we will, God willing, rejoin you. You are our predecessors and we are your followers. I ask God to give us and you well-being. O God, forgive us and them!
It is recommended to visit the cemetery on Thursday night, Friday, Friday night until sunrise, and on Monday, for it is said---and this is supported by various narrations---that the spirits of the dead return to their graves at those times.
The visitor must ask for forgiveness and mercy for them, read whatever Qur'an he can and make over the reward to them; he should remember that soon he will go to the same end, and learn the lessons to be drawn from their condition.
When he visits the graves of his parents, relatives, or anyone else who had rights over him, he must sit with unhurried serenity, pray for them, and ask abundantly for forgiveness, for they rejoice at this, and are glad. When he visits the graves of righteous people he should pray in abundance, for prayers are answered at many such places, as has often been experienced. The tomb of Imam Musaal-Kazim, the son of Imam Ja'faral-Sadiq, is known in Baghdad has the 'Proven Medicine', that is, for prayers to be answered and worries to be relieved, and so is the tomb of Ma'ruf al-Karkhi, also in Baghdad. Some of the noble house of the 'Alawi Sayyids used to sit at the tomb of our master al-Faqih al-Muqaddam for such long periods, in the heat of the sun, that sweat could have been wrung from their clothes, while they, because of their profound concentration in prayer, were unaware of this. This is reported of Shaykh 'Abdallah ibn 'Ali and others.

Source: Imam 'Abdallah ibn'Al-awial-Haddad, Sabil al-iddikarwa 'li 'tibar bimay amurru bi'l insan min al-a'mar,( The Lives of Man), translated by Dr. Mostafa al-Badawi, The Quilliam Press, London, England, 1411/1991, p. 45-48